Moments - Jason Tanenbaum

"Live in the moment." These first words I heard from my leader, Matt, became words that I would commit to. After a five-mile off-trail hike to a 7000-foot summit, through rocky and icy terrain, I finally realized what Matt meant. For two hours, enduring probably the hardest physical strain my body has ever experienced, my thoughts were flying.

I could only think about my problems at home, some girl I had kissed, or trying to win the favor of the other students; but with the few final steps, my horizon suddenly expanded. The spectacle of an endless range of snow-capped mountains, a river softly meandering through the valley, and glossy black rocks staring at me left my mind in a state of utter tranquility.

For the first time, my adolescent problems and thoughts of home and school vanished. I could focus only on the present. After fifteen seconds of sheer awe and amazement, a friend tapped me on the back and said, "The harder the climb, the better the view. " I turned from the scenery for a second and focused on my friend. As I smiled and acknowledged him, I realized what living in the moment was all about.

Arriving in Alaska, I had felt timid. My first outdoor experience with complete strangers from whom I would have to earn trust and respect initiated with butterflies in my stomach. This program, Moondance, promised leadership-building and adventure, two auspicious qualities I was in need of before the trip.

At home I was not accustomed to worrying about things like water, food, and shelter. Now, in the wilderness, these three things essential to human survival had been stripped from me. I would have to work with the group to reclaim these necessities. Cooking my own food, purifying water, and pitching tents became regular practices. After the three weeks turned these tasks into daily routine, home seemed like a whole new type of "wilderness". Accustomed to continual hard work in Alaska, I soon realized, back home, that I didn't have enough to do.

I finally grasped what my parents had meant when they called me lazy. From that point on, I decided to change my habits. I accepted more responsibilities. I started with the little things, adding chores and running errands for my parents. I began a tutoring business to make money for myself and create more financial independence. For the first time, I felt mature and self-reliant. I found a starting point for adulthood.

Weeks after returning from Alaska with a feeling of rebirth, I reflected by composing a poem on my experience and focused once again on what "living in the moment" was all about.

"Where do you live?" the curious man asks.
I live at home with my luxuries,
In the airport with strangers.
I live with the wise man,
Who navigates the sea.
I live surrounded by glaciers,
On the blacksand.
I live with the icebergs,
The thundering avalanche.
I live in the Sound,
With the colorful orcas.
I live where the stones skip,
And the tide is aroused.
I live on the land,
Neighbor to the mountains.

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